Daisy does her diary

OK, we’ve been here nearly 3 weeks and it’s time to catch up diary-wise. Have settled in well. The staff at this so-called boot camp are friendly enough and the food’s OK. Just like Farnham really: meaty stuff served up in jelly or gravy and different coloured biscuits. Not exactly 57 varieties but we go along with it. I must say there’s loads of space outside with plenty of wild life. The training regime seems pretty benign despite Dr Dick’s increasingly agitated instructions about the rabbit cull. Still nothing to report on this apart from Billy’s bringing one in and then letting it go. What a prat. He seems to think that that’s it as he’s done bugger all since. Dr D’s been showing us rabbit-recognition silhouettes but we already know what the bloody things look like. He doesn’t seem to realise that if plan A (catching them) doesn’t work then plan B (deterrents) will. That’s why I’m in and out of the cat flap rubbing scent around the place. I thought Elizabeth Garden was suitable for me and I found a bottle of Lynx for Billy. But it’s gone to his head (it’s eye-wateringly pungent) and the idiot’s striding about pretending he’s a Big Cat. What a poser. Dr D and Sister Sue have been away for 3 days on other business and a lady called Bethan’s been looking in to check on us. She presents an interesting spectacle: floppy sun hat, frilly dress down to just below the waist, industrial spec black tights (with hole above knee), and gum boots. Billy bolted behind the dresser. What a wuss. By the way, we haven’t forgotten why we’re here and the one useful thing that Billy’s done is to get his Agent report away. Hope you got it. We’re keeping the property under surveillance as well as the staff and will send pics to prove it.  Ta ta for now.